[LISA] The podcast is part of the Practice of the Practice network, a network of podcasts seeking to help you market and grow your business and yourself. To hear other podcasts like Faith Fringes, the Holistic Counseling Podcast, and Beta Male Revolution, go to the website, www.practiceofthepractice.com/slash network. Welcome to the Am I Ok? Podcast, where you will discover that being highly sensitive is something to embrace and it’s actually a gift you bring to the world. We will learn together how to take ownership of your high sensitivity, so you can make positive changes in your life, in the lives of others, and it’s totally okay to feel this way. I’m your host, Lisa Lewis. I’m so glad you’re here for the journey. Welcome to today’s episode of the Am I Ok? Podcast. I’m your host, Lisa Lewis today. I’m bringing you another live Am I Ok? consultation, which is part of a series of episodes. This is not your typical podcast interview. In this episode, I answer one big question our listener needs help with around high sensitivity, whether it is for themselves, someone they know or anything else related to highly sensitive person. I’m so excited to bring this to you. Welcome to today’s episode of the Am I Ok? Podcast. I’m your host, Lisa Lewis today. I’m bringing you another live Am I Ok? consultation, which is part of a series of episodes. This is not your typical podcast interview. In this episode, I answer one big question our listener needs help with around high sensitivity, whether it is for themselves, someone they know or anything else related to highly sensitive person. I’m so excited to bring this to you. Today’s guest is Tanise McInnis. Tanise is the therapist that offers hope and healing to the parents of special needs children, as well as individuals and families impacted by life stressors, anxiety, and grief. So welcome to the podcast to Tanise. [TANISE] Thank you. So happy to be here this morning. [LISA] Yes, I’m happy to have you here too. I like to ask all my guests this question, do you consider yourself a highly sensitive person? And if you do, if you don’t mind sharing a little bit about that story? [TANISE] Well, I do consider myself to be a highly sensitive person. I’m the type of person that I feel very deeply. Sometimes I feel too much. I think being a highly sensitive person is not a bad thing. It’s just being able to have an awareness of it, have a balance, and I have definitely have had to have that within my own life being not only a therapist who offers hope and healing to special needs parents. I am a parent of a special needs child. So being able to have that awareness and balance has definitely helped me. [LISA] Yes. So not only are you helping people in your professional life, but you’re also helping your own children too, as well and taking care of yourself. So there’s a lot to take care of. So what is your big question you have for us today? [TANISE] So in thinking about the times that we’re living in, in a pandemic where families have had to quarantine and support services have been that maybe once were established are not there anymore. So my question is what strategies would you say are most important for parents not only those with special needs children, but parenting in general to be able to work towards having more self-care during this pandemic and balancing being a highly sensitive person? [LISA] That’s a great question. And I’m wondering if you can share what have you used so far or what have you been doing so far? [TANISE] So three important interventions that I see have been very important, not only to myself, but within my practice is number 1 helping parents to be able to set boundaries. That can include planning and scheduling or something as simple as just saying no. Sometimes that’s hard for a lot of people. Something else is being able, working with families with knowing their triggers. So identifying those triggers, knowing how they feel in certain situations like being quarantined and one strategy that has helped them with that is using a stress journal. And then the third thing, which is just so important and it’s individualized and different for person to person, and that’s just practicing a good self-care regimen whether that’s listening to music, watching a comedy, special meditating or using mindfulness. So those three interventions have really made an impact with some of the families that I’ve worked with as well as myself. [LISA] Yes. I love all of those that you mentioned. The ones that I’ll add to those, I mean, I would just keep doing what you’re doing, especially if they’re working is working with parents, also being a parent myself and now that my kids are older in college and high school, and then looking back that, just overlooking myself as a priority and putting all my attention onto other people. My first suggestion to everybody, whether you’re a highly sensitive person or not, a parent, not a parent, is that we have to make ourselves a priority. And I like to use the analogy of if you’re on an airplane and there’s an emergency and that you have to put your oxygen mask on you first, because if we’re too busy putting the oxygen mask on everybody else that we don’t put it on ourselves first that we’re not going to be around to put it on anybody or let alone ourselves. So putting it on ourselves first, and that can be really hard to make ourselves a priority. And that could go into some deep wounding not feeling that you are a priority. So if that is hard for somebody, I would suggest reaching out and getting some help with that with working with a professional counselor. And also so taking time every day to make yourself a priority, and like the suggestions, you are using a stress journal, meditating, mindfulness; whatever that is for you, physical activity, picking a time of day that works for you and try to stick to it. And as parents, as professionals, our lives are busy. Even five minutes a day, you can pick a five minute window and try to stick to that every day. And if that time doesn’t work then try for a week. Experiment with it and if that time doesn’t work pick another time until something really sticks with you. And it’s not about the amount of time. It’s really about the quality of time. And it’s those little steps, those little amounts of time that add up over a bigger amount of time. That’s also, when we give ourselves space and priority, if we can just go inside and give ourselves, just closing our eyes, taking some deep breaths, meditating, journaling, just thinking about ourselves, what’s happening inside, are we anxious, are we happy, are we sad and just recognizing that for ourselves. When we recognize that then we really acknowledge how we feel and then we can go on about our days. Another thing would be to do something every day, if you can. That brings you a sense of pleasure, joy or happiness, something that you look forward to that will motivate you to do self-care. And that might take a little bit of experimenting too, to see what that would be for you. Another important thing about highly sensitive people is, and I know you mentioned that you feel deeply. Highly sensitive people like to feel that they are doing something creative. Like they’re making a difference in the world. So doing something that you love, that motivates you, and you look forward to doing it. And that will be, you know creativity could be doing something like writing a book. It could be doing a piece of art, something that you feel that you’re contributing, not only to yourself, but making a difference in the world. How do those sound to you so far [TANISE] That sounds great and definitely in line with bringing out that self-care aspect that a lot of sometimes highly sensitive persons and others can sometimes overlook. [LISA] Yes. And I also like to suggest, you know spirituality can be a big part of being a highly sensitive person. I’m not referring to like religion, but some kind of spiritual practice. And that could be like meditating or being in nature, doing something like there, again, that creativity or also creating like a sacred space in your home or your office, or like a wellness room, a place where your mind, your body knows. It’s like I can just go here and relax and take that deep breath. It feels very calming and peaceful. And then with kids, sometimes we don’t have that luxury to spend 30 minutes or an hour. So even if it’s just five minutes and it’s practicing modeling to them too, that, hey, I’m important. So they’re going to pick up on that and say, “I’m important too. I need time for myself.” [TANISE] That’s true. [LISA] So what would you, what we’ve talked about today, Tanise, what would you like to take away from our talk? [TANISE] I’ll take away that that in being a highly sensitive person or otherwise, it’s just very important to make yourself a priority and incorporate self-care into your life. Ask how that self-care looks to you because it’s individualistic. and just making sure that you’re taking care of yourself so that you’re able to take care of others. [LISA] Right. That’s wonderful. I’m so glad that you came on the show today and you asked these really important questions and I’m hoping that this was helpful and that it’s also helpful for other parents. [TANISE] Yes, it really is. Thank you so much. [LISA] Yes. And thank you. My listeners for tuning in today. Remember to subscribe, rate, and review wherever you get your podcasts. And this is Lisa Lewis reminding each one of you that you are okay. Until next time, take care. Thank you for listening today at Am I Okay? Podcast. If you are loving the show, please rate, review and subscribe to it on your favorite podcast platform. Also, if you’d like to learn how to manage situations as a highly sensitive person, discover your unique gift as a highly sensitive person, and learn how to be comfortable in your own skin, I offer a free eight-week email course called Highly Sensitive People. Just go to amiokpodcast.com to sign up. In addition, I love hearing from my listeners, drop me an email to let me know what is on your mind. You can reach me at lisa@amiokpodcast.com. . This podcast is designed to provide accurate and authoritative information in regards to the subject matter covered. It is given with the understanding that neither the host, the publisher, or the guests are rendering legal, accounting, clinical, or any other professional information. If you want to professional, you should find one.